Rasa Library
CHAPTER 7.14

Ideal Family Life

34 verses

7.14.1
śrī-yudhiṣṭhira uvāca
gṛhastha etāṁ padavīṁ
vidhinā yena cāñjasā
yāyād deva-ṛṣe brūhi
mādṛśo gṛha-mūòha-dhīḥ

Mahārāja Yudhiṣṭhira said: O great sage! Please explain how we who are staying at home without knowledge of the goal of life may also easily attain liberation, according to the instructions of the Vedas.

Having described the three āśramas of renunciation, Nārada explains in the Fourteenth Chapter the path of the householder engaged in worldly activity according to time and place. Can one attain liberation, the result of the paths of renunciation by the path of enjoyment, if the path of enjoyment leads to birth and death? The King asks Nārada to begin describing the path of enjoyment for a person qualified for the householder, after having spoken of brahmacārī, vanaprastha and sannyāsī life, all involved in renunciation.

śrī-nārada uvāca
gṛheṣv avasthito rājan
kriyāḥ kurvan yathocitāḥ
vāsudevārpaṇaṁ sākṣād
upāsīta mahā-munīn

Nārada said: O King! A person situated in household life, performing his prescribed duties as an offering to Vāsudeva, should worship the great devotees.

Performing his actions as an offering to Vāsudeva he should worship the devotees.

śṛṇvan bhagavato ’bhīkṣṇam
avatāra-kathāmṛtam
śraddadhāno yathā-kālam
upaśānta-janāvṛtaḥ

sat-saḍgāc chanakaiḥ saḍgam ātma-jāyātmajādiṣu vimuñcen mucyamāneṣu svayaṁ svapnavad utthitaḥ

Constant hearing with faith the nectar of the activities of the Supreme Lord and his incarnations at various times in association with persons having controlled minds, he should gradually become detached from his wife and children from whom he will be separated anyway, exactly like a man on wakening from a dream becomes detached from the son and wife in his dream.

Yathā-kalam means “at various times such as the afternoon.” Being surrounded by persons with controlled minds, he should constantly (abhiīkṣṇam) listen to topics of the Lord. This means he should not listen to other topics at that time. He should become detached from wife and children from whom he will naturally be separated, just as on awakening from a dream one becomes detached from sons or wife seen in a dream.

yāvad-artham upāsīno
dehe gehe ca paṇòitaḥ
virakto raktavat tatra
nṛ-loke naratāṁ nyaset

While enjoying material objects and remaining neutral to material objects, appearing attached but internally being detached, he should show himself as a human being situated in his house in human society.

While enjoying material objects and remaining neutral (paṇdītaḥ) to objects like body and house, appearing attached but internally being detached, he should show himself as a human being situated in his house (tatra) in human society.

.

jñātayaḥ pitarau putrā
bhrātaraḥ suhṛdo ’pare
yad vadanti yad icchanti
cānumodeta nirmamaḥ

To whatever his relatives, friends, children, parents, brothers or anyone else says or wants, he should agree, without being attached.

Without attachment (nirmamaḥ) he should agree.

divyaṁ bhaumaṁ cāntarīkṣaṁ
vittam acyuta-nirmitam
tat sarvam upayuñjāna
etat kuryāt svato budhaḥ

Utilizing whatever comes from the rain and sun, from the earth, or accidentally, all created by the Lord, as his wealth, the intelligent householder should perform his daily and occasional duties.

Utilizing what comes from mines (bhaumam) or what is obtained suddenly without plan (antarīkṣam), which are all created by the Lord, as his wealth, without worrying, he should perform his daily and periodic duties. Svataḥ vittam means “his own wealth.”

yāvad bhriyeta jaṭharaṁ
tāvat svatvaṁ hi dehinām
adhikaṁ yo ’bhimanyeta
sa steno daṇòam arhati

One may claim proprietorship only over wealth required to maintain his body. He who desires proprietorship over more than that is considered a thief, and he deserves to be punished.

If by luck he attains a large amount of wealth, he should not be proud of that, and should enjoy only as much as he needs. Yāvad bhriyeta jatharam means “by as much as the stomach is filled.”

mṛgoṣṭra-khara-markākhu-
sarīsṛp khaga-makṣikāḥ
ātmanaḥ putravat paśyet
tair eṣām antaraṁ kiyat

One should treat animals such as deer, camels, asses, monkeys, mice, snakes, birds and flies exactly like one’s own son. How little difference there actually is between children and these innocent animals!

Just as one divides food among one’s sons, one should also give food to the animals.

tri-vargaṁ nātikṛcchreṇa
bhajeta gṛha-medhy api
yathā-deśaṁ yathā-kālaṁ
yāvad-daivopapāditam

Even if one is a householder, one should not endeavor very hard for religiosity, economic development or satisfaction of the senses. He should maintain himself with whatever is available according to place and time, by the grace of the Lord.

One should not enjoy by making great endeavor, but with whatever comes with little effort by chance. One should not expect great wealth. The word api signifies that this is the case for the householder, what to speak of the brahamacārīs and others engaged in guru’s service.

āśvāghānte ’vasāyibhyaḥ
kāmān saṁvibhajed yathā
apy ekām ātmano dārāṁ
nṛṇāṁ svatva-graho yataḥ

Dogs, fallen persons and untouchables, including Caṇòālas, should all be maintained with their proper necessities, as is suitable. Because of this, even one’s wife, with whom one is most intimately attached, should be offered for the reception of guests.

One should offer whatever is necessary to dogs, sinners and lower castes such as Caṇòalas. Dārām in the feminine gender is poetic license. Even though one’s own service is neglected while the wife serves guests, she should be engaged thus in serving guests (and not serving in any other way), since it is said that one should divide things as much as is appropriate. This is the opinion of Śrīdhara Svaṁī. Others also do not take the words literally. Yat means “because of which.”

jahyād yad-arthe svān prāṇān
hanyād vā pitaraṁ gurum
tasyāṁ svatvaṁ striyāṁ jahyād
yas tena hy ajito jitaḥ

The unconquerable Lord is conquered by the person who gives up possessiveness of his wife, for whom he would kill himself, his father or his guru.

This verse explains that giving up attachment to one’s wife is difficult.

kṛmi-viò-bhasma-niṣṭhāntaṁ
kvedaṁ tucchaṁ kalevaram
kva tadīya-ratir bhāryā
kvāyam ātmā nabhaś-chadiḥ

What is this insignificant body which finally ends in worms, stool or ashes? What is this attraction to the body of a wife? What value is the wife in comparison to the Supreme Lord who covers the sky?

This verse gives the logic for giving up attachment to wife. Her body finally ends (niṣṭhā) in worms, stool or ashes. What is the attachment to the wife’s body (tadīyā-ratiḥ)? What is the Supreme Lord (ātmā) who covers even the sky? This means “If one attains the Lord by giving up attachment to the wife, so much more is gained.”

siddhair yajñāvaśiṣṭārthaiḥ
kalpayed vṛttim ātmanaḥ
śeṣe svatvaṁ tyajan prājñaḥ
padavīṁ mahatām iyāt

One should maintain oneself by the remnants of the five daily sacrifices obtained from products of the sky, earth and unexpected fortune. The wise man, giving up possessiveness, attains the greatest position at the end.

Previously it was said that one should maintain attachment to object only to the extent of filling the belly. Now the means of doing that is explained. One should maintain oneself by the remnants of the five sacrifices arising from materials of the sky, earth or by accident.

devān ṛṣīn nṛ-bhūtāni
pitèn ātmānam anvaham
sva-vṛttyāgata-vittena
yajeta puruṣaṁ pṛthak

Daily one should worship the devatās, humans, all living entities, the Pitṛs, oneself, and separately the Supreme Lord, by wealth earned through one’s occupation.

yarhy ātmano ’dhikārādyāḥ
sarvāḥ syur yajña-sampadaḥ
vaitānikena vidhinā
agni-hotrādinā yajet

When one has the capacity for gathering all items, one should perform sacrifice according to the rules with offerings.

na hy agni-mukhato ’yaṁ vai
bhagavān sarva-yajña-bhuk
ijyeta haviṣā rājan
yathā vipra-mukhe hutaiḥ

O King! The Supreme Lord, enjoyer of all sacrifices, is not worshipped by offerings to the fires as much as he is worshiped by offerings in the mouths of the brāhmaṇas.

One should not be too attached to performing sacrifices. The Lord is not worshiped as much by offerings to the mouth of the fire as he is worshipped by offerings of food to the mouth of the brāhmaṇa.

tasmād brāhmaṇa-deveṣu
martyādiṣu yathārhataḥ
tais taiḥ kāmair yajasvainaṁ
kṣetra-jñaṁ brāhmaṇān anu

Worship the Supreme Lord, knower of the field, according one’s ability, by offering various objects to brāhmaṇas, who are devatās, and then to ordinary humans.

Worship the Supreme Lord, knower of the field, by offering foods to the brāhmaṇas who are devatās, and after the brāhmaṇas, to other humans. Another version has brāhmaṇānanam, the Lord whose mouth is the brāhmaṇas.

kuryād apara-pakṣīyaṁ
māsi prauṣṭha-pade dvijaḥ
śrāddhaṁ pitror yathā-vittaṁ
tad-bandhūnāṁ ca vittavān

A brāhmaṇa who is sufficiently rich must offer oblations according to his means to the forefathers during the dark-moon fortnight in the month of Bhādra.

Prauṣthā-pade means “in Bhādra month.”

ayane viṣuve kuryād
vyatīpāte dina-kṣaye
candrādityoparāge ca
dvādaśyāṁ śravaṇeṣu ca

tṛtīyāyāṁ śukla-pakṣe navamyām atha kārtike catasṛṣv apy aṣṭakāsu hemante śiśire tathā

māghe ca sita-saptamyāṁ

maghā-rākā-samāgame

rākayā cānumatyā ca

māsarkṣāṇi yutāny api

dvādaśyām anurādhā syāc

chravaṇas tisra uttarāḥ

tisṛṣv ekādaśī vāsu

janmarkṣa-śroṇa-yoga-yuk

He should perform the śrāddha ceremony at the winter and summer solstices, at spring and autumn equinoxes, in the yoga named Vyatīpāta, on the day in which three lunar tithis are conjoined, during an eclipse of either the moon or the sun, or on the twelfth lunar day when the moon is the Śravaṇa-nakṣatra. He should perform this ceremony on the Akṣaya-tṛtīyā day, during Navamī of the bright fortnight of Kārtika, on the four Aṣṭamīs of the dark fortnight during Hemanta and Śiśira seasons (four months), on the Saptamī of the bright fortnight of the month of Māgha, during the conjunction of Maghā-nakṣatra and the full-moon day, and on the days when the moon is completely full, or not quite completely full, conjoined with the constellations during the month from which the names of the months are derived. He should also perform the śrāddha ceremony on the Dvādaśī when it is in conjunction with any of the constellations named Anurādhā, Śravaṇa, Uttara-phalgunī, Uttarāṣāòhā or Uttara-bhādrapadā. He should perform this ceremony when the Ekādaśī is in conjunction with either Uttara-phalgunī, Uttarāṣāòhā or Uttara-bhādrapadā. Finally, he should perform this ceremony when his own birth constellation or Śravaṇa constellation have special astrological combinations.

One should perform the śrāddha rites on the solstices and equinoxes, and before the summer solstice, and before that on the Akṣaya-tṛtīya. During the Hemanta and Śiśira seasons there are four Aṣṭamīs of the dark fortnight. On those days one should perform śrāddhas. Each month is named after a constellation. When the full moon, or slightly less, joins the constellation during the month named after it, one should perform śrāddha rites. Amara-koṣa says that anumati means one phase less than a full moon and rākā means a full moon. One should perform the śrāddhas on Dvādaśī conjoined with Anurādhā, Śravaṇa, Uttaraphalgunī, Uttaraāśaòhā and Uttarabhādrapadā, or when the latter three conjoin an Ekādaśī. One should not combine this with Ekādaśī fast since śrāddha rites are forbidden on fast days. Brahma-vaivarta Purāṇa says:

ye kurvanti mahīpāla-śrāddhañ caikādaśī-dine

trayas te narakaṁ yānti dātā bhoktā prerakaḥ

Those who perform śrāddha rites on the Ekādaśī day, the giver of food, the receiver of food, and the person who orders the rites, go to hell.

Since one cannot perform the offerings to the Pitṛs on fast days, one should do that on the next day, according to Padma Purāṇa:

ekādaśyān tu prāptāyāṁ mātā-pitror mṛte ’hani

dvādaśyāṁ tat pradātavyaṁ nopavāsadine kvacit

If one’s mother or father dies on Ekādaśī, one should offer rites on the Dvādaśī, not on the fast day.

In the Puṣkara-khaṇòa it is said:

ekādaśyāṁ yadā rāma śrāddhaṁ naimittikaṁ bhavet

tad dinan tu parityajya dvādaśyāṁ śrāddham ācaret

O Rāma! When śrāddhas occur on the Ekādaśī one should reject that day and perform them on the Dvādaśī.

When one’ birth constellation or Śravana constellation have special astrological combinations (yogas), one should perform this rite.

ta ete śreyasaḥ kālā
nèṇāṁ śreyo-vivardhanāḥ
kuryāt sarvātmanaiteṣu
śreyo ’moghaṁ tadāyuṣaḥ

All of these special times increase auspiciousness for humanity. One should perform actions at these times. This will produce unfailing success in the whole of man’s life.

Performing acts of dharma, not just śrāddha rites at these times produces auspicious effects. One should perform auspicious acts at these times and the (tadā) one will have unfailing success (amogham) in one’s life.

eṣu snānaṁ japo homo
vrataṁ deva-dvijārcanam
pitṛ-deva-nṛ-bhūtebhyo
yad dattaṁ tad dhy anaśvaram

During these times, if one bathes in a sacred place, if one chants, offers fire sacrifices or executes vows, or if one worships the Supreme Lord, or gives offerings to the brāhmaṇas, the forefathers, the devatās and living entities in general, one attains permanent benefit.

saṁskāra-kālo jāyāyā
apatyasyātmanas tathā
preta-saṁsthā mṛtāhaś ca
karmaṇy abhyudaye nṛpa

O King Yudhiṣṭhira! At the time prescribed for saṁskāras for one’s self, one’s wife or one’s children, or during funeral ceremonies and annual death ceremonies, one obtains great benefit by performing them at the times mentioned above.

At the time of saṁskāras for the wife such as puṁsavana, or for the children, such as jāta-karma, or for oneself, such as initiation, into sacrifice, at the time of burning the body (preta-saṁsthā) and yearly śrāddhas, there will be great benefit by using those auspicious times.

.

atha deśān pravakṣyāmi
dharmādi-śreya-āvahān
sa vai puṇyatamo deśaḥ
sat-pātraṁ yatra labhyate

bimbaṁ bhagavato yatra sarvam etac carācaram yatra ha brāhmaṇa-kulaṁ tapo-vidyā-dayānvitam

Now I shall describe the places where religious performances may be well executed. The most auspicious places are where there are Vaiṣṇavas, who are equal to the deity of the Lord who is the support of this entire cosmic manifestation, with all its moving and nonmoving living entities, or where there are learned brāhmaṇas endowed with austerity, education and mercy.

Sat-pātram means the Vaiṣṇava, who is equal to the form of the Lord who is universe of moving and non-moving beings.

yatra yatra harer arcā
sa deśaḥ śreyasāṁ padam
yatra gaḍgādayo nadyaḥ
purāṇeṣu ca viśrutāḥ

The best places are places where there are forms of the Lord, and where the celebrated sacred rivers mentioned in the Purāṇas flow.

The devotee of the Lord is considered superior to the forms of the Lord. Thus it is said mad-bhakta-pūjābhyadhikā: the worship of my devotee is superior to my worship. (SB 11.19.21)

arcāyām eva haraye pūjāṁ yaḥ śraddhayehate

na tad-bhakteṣu cānyeṣu sa bhaktaḥ prākṛtaḥ smṛtaḥ

A person who is very faithfully engaged in the worship of the deity in the temple but does not know how to behave toward devotees or people in general is called a kaniṣṭha-adhikārī. SB 11.2.47

Arcā refers to the deity or śālagrāma. The fixed forms are those such as Jagannātha, in places such as Orissa.

sarāṁsi puṣkarādīni
kṣetrāṇy arhāśritāny uta
kurukṣetraṁ gaya-śiraḥ
prayāgaḥ pulahāśramaḥ

naimiṣaṁ phālgunaṁ setuḥ prabhāso ’tha kuśa-sthalī vārāṇasī madhu-purī pampā bindu-saras tathā

nārāyaṇāśramo nandā

sītā-rāmāśramādayaḥ

sarve kulācalā rājan

mahendra-malayādayaḥ

ete puṇyatamā deśā

harer arcāśritāś ca ye

etān deśān niṣeveta

śreyas-kāmo hy abhīkṣṇaśaḥ

dharmo hy atrehitaḥ puṁsāṁ

sahasrādhi-phalodayaḥ

The sacred lakes like Puṣkara, places where saintly persons live, Kurukṣetra, Gayā, Prayāga, Pulahāśrama, Naimiṣāraṇya, the Phālgu River, Setubandha, Prabhāsa, Dvārakā, Vārāṇasī, Mathurā, Pampā, Bindu-sarovara, Badarikāśrama, the Nandā River, the places where Lord Rāmacandra and mother Sītā took shelter, such as Citrakūṭa, and also Mahendra and Malaya mountain ranges—all of these, and places having deities, are to be considered most pure. One who intends to advance in spiritual life should visit all these places again and again. Acts performed here give a thousand times the result of the same activities performed in other places.

Acts performed in these places give a thousand times more result than at other places.

pātraṁ tv atra niruktaṁ vai
kavibhiḥ pātra-vittamaiḥ
harir evaika urvīśa
yan-mayaṁ vai carācaram

O King of the earth! It has been decided by learned scholars that only the Supreme Lord, in whom all that is moving or nonmoving within this universe is resting, is the best person to whom everything should be given.

To whom should offerings be given for progressing in dharma? In order to speak about offerings directly to the Supreme Lord, to the Vaiṣṇavas, brāhmaṇas and all living entities, first the recipient of offerings is explained.

devarṣy-arhatsu vai satsu
tatra brahmātmajādiṣu
rājan yad agra-pūjāyāṁ
mataḥ pātratayācyutaḥ

O King Yudhiṣṭhira! The venerable sages, the devatās and the sons of Lord Brahmā present at your Rājasūya sacrifice decided that Kṛṣṇa was qualified as the first person to be worshiped.

It was decided without quarrel that the Lord was qualified for first worship at the Rājasūya sacrifice. Among the devatās, sages qualified by sacrifice and austerity (arhatsu), and among sons of Brahmā like the Kumāras, it was decided that Kṛṣṇa was qualified for the first worship.

jīva-rāśibhir ākīrṇa
aṇòa-kośāḍghripo mahān
tan-mūlatvād acyutejyā
sarva-jīvātma-tarpaṇam

The universe is a huge tree filled with billions of jīvas. Worship of Acyuta will satisfy all jīvas since the Lord is the root of the tree.

The reason for their agreement is given. Because the Lord is the root of the universe, he satisfies all the jīvas.

purāṇy anena sṛṣṭāni
nṛ-tiryag-ṛṣi-devatāḥ
śete jīvena rūpeṇa
pureṣu puruṣo hy asau

The Lord has created bodies for the jīvas in human, animal, sage and devatā forms. The Lord resides as Paramātmā in all their bodies.

Rather than directly worship the Lord at the time of his descent, since it was said that the devotee is the real recipient of offerings (sat-pātram) in verse 27, now it is explained that one should worship all living beings.

teṣv eva bhagavān rājaṁs
tāratamyena vartate
tasmāt pātraṁ hi puruṣo
yāvān ātmā yatheyate

O King! The Paramātmā resides in all beings proportionately. Therefore he is the object of worship in those beings according to the degree of their knowledge and renunciation.

Because the Lord resides as Paramātmā to various degrees in animals and others, Paramātmā is the object of worship. However, to the degree that the jīva has superiority in knowledge, detachment and other qualities, he becomes the object of worship. Śruti says puruṣatve cāvistarām ātmā: in the human form a person understands ātmā. (Aitreya-āraṇyaka 2.3.2.4)

dṛṣṭvā teṣāṁ mitho nṛṇām
avajñānātmatāṁ nṛpa
tretādiṣu harer arcā
kriyāyai kavibhiḥ kṛtā

My dear King, when great sages saw that people were disrespectful of each other at the beginning of Tretā-yuga, deity worship in the temple was introduced.

When the sages saw that humans could not respect the Lord in all beings, since they were mutually disrespectful of each other, deity worship was introduced. Avajñānātmatām means that they developed intelligence (ātmā) which disrespected others.

tato ’rcāyāṁ hariṁ kecit
saṁśraddhāya saparyayā
upāsata upāstāpi
nārthadā puruṣa-dviṣām

After that, people offered all the paraphernalia with faith to the deity, but there was no result for those who offended the Lord.

Upāstā means “worshipped.” Though worship takes place, there is no effect because of greater offense than simply disrespect mentioned in the previous verse.

puruṣeṣv api rājendra
supātraṁ brāhmaṇaṁ viduḥ
tapasā vidyayā tuṣṭyā
dhatte vedaṁ hares tanum

O best of kings! Among all persons, a brāhmaṇa must be accepted as the best within this material world because such a brāhmaṇa, by austerity, knowledge and satisfaction, possesses the Vedas, which are the body of the Supreme Lord.

Among humans those with austerity and other good qualities are the best. The brāhmaṇa possesses the Vedas, which indicate the Lord or Brahman, by his knowledge. The word brāhmaṇa means a person who studies and knows the Veda.

7.14.42
nanv asya brāhmaṇā rājan
kṛṣṇasya jagad-ātmanaḥ
punantaḥ pāda-rajasā
tri-lokīṁ daivataṁ mahat

O King! The brāhmaṇas, who purify the three worlds with the dust of their feet, are greatly worshiped by the Supreme Lord.

Kṛṣṇa respects the brāhmaṇas because he is affectionate to them. One should not say by this statement that they are actually more worthy of respect than the Lord, since Kṛṣṇa was considered the most worthy of worship among all the brāhmaṇas present at the Rājasūya.

Thus ends the commentary on the Fourteenth Chapter of the Seventh Canto of the Bhāgavatam for the pleasure of the devotees, in accordance with the previous ācāryas.

The Behavior of a Perfect PersonInstructions for Civilized Human Beings